The Discovery

-Continued from Part 2- (The ADHD Diagnosis)

Everything I read about Autism was ME. It was like it was wrote about my life.

I didn’t tell ANYONE.

I learnt more, I read more, I sat with it. I did online test after online test after online test.

I started to feel comfortable that I was likely Autistic.

This deep love and acceptance began to wash over me. A contentness and an understanding of my entire lived experience.

I finally knew my Heart. My Soul. My Essence.

After a six months of every single day learning about Autism (hello special interest), I shared with my safe person - G.

Autism isn’t like ADHD. (my perspective)

ADHD is widely accepted in our society and is often seen as just a little “quirk” in someone’s personality. Don’t get me wrong, people with ADHD don’t have it easy, and also it just isn’t the same experience as Autism. Autism is still widely judged and rejected within our society.

I was so fucking scared to tell G. My safest person in the world.

I cried. I told G that if he wanted a divorce because he didn’t know he was marrying someone who is Autistic, that I understood.

I am deeply deeply grateful for the safety we have within our relationship because G met me with kindness, compassion and love.

A weight was off. Now he knew. He accepted me for who I truly am.

I continued to sit with it, learn about it and share what I learnt with G. I finally had someone to talk to about it.

Autism became my special interest. I currently have 5 books about Autism on my night stand as I write this.

I shared with a few more safe people and finally in the summer of of 2025 I decided to get an official diagnosis…

-Continue reading Part 4- (I am Autistic)